A special family

 

Walking through the back lot of the church today, after celebrating our beautiful Mass, and after a few hours of religious studies, my son and I were leisurely  moving towards our car in silence when I spotted a boy about ten years old trailing his parents as they went into the church building for the afternoon celebration of Holy Mass.

This boy was wearing attire that I thought more appropriate for the pool side; sloppy and wrinkled cotton shorts, a big oversized T-shirt and flip flops that he shuffled on his bare feet. As a mother, I thought, what parent would allow their child to go to church in this attire? As Director of Faith Formation I thought, what family catechesis I would need to do in order to address this issue in the future.

I asked my son, “Zac, see that boy going into church? What do you think of what he is wearing?” I was expecting him to say to me what I so often say to him….. “Those aren’t church clothes. He shouldn’t wear that to Mass”. It was my test to see if he was going to have the “right answer” after all my years of drilling that into him.

Instead he said softly and thoughtfully, “Mom, at least he is going to Mass with his family”.

This made me stop and think. He didn’t have the right answer, according to me….but perhaps  he had the right answer according to Jesus. My son, without hesitation was accepting this boy and his family exactly where they are in their faith journey. Where I went straight to judgment and concern for the physical appearance, my son went straight to the place of the heart and acceptance.

I think most would agree, it is important what we wear and how we present ourselves to others in all areas of society. We wouldn’t go to the office wearing cutoff shorts and a scruffy t-shirt. We wouldn’t go to the Mall in our PJ’s. When we go to someplace really special, we usually take more time in selecting our wardrobe. Well, at least most people do. The celebration of the Mass is no exception. Catholics believe that when we gather for worship it involves all of our being….our spiritual and physical preparation matters.  Most of us have the ability to know and practice this because we accept this as part of living in a cultured society where norms exist. 

Yet I hear my son’s words and they resonate in my heart. What he said so humbly IS true too. We must accept people where they are, we must not judge others.

I thought of the Gospel reading from the book of Mark today, where a part of what we heard says:

Then he (Jesus) sat down, called the Twelve, and said to them,
"If anyone wishes to be first,
he shall be the last of all and the servant of all."
Taking a child, he placed it in the their midst,
and putting his arms around it, he said to them,
"Whoever receives one child such as this in my name, receives me;
and whoever receives me,
receives not me but the One who sent me."

Jesus is teaching us to value everyone, no matter their status or education or class or faith experience. The child in the early Jewish culture was “no one” to society. They were not productive citizens yet, they were like servants. In fact, the Aramaic word for child and servant is the same.  When Jesus put his arm around that child I visualize him holding the child in a way that emphasized, “Here is someone special”. This was radical to those he was speaking to in his time.  He was teaching his disciples a new way of seeing. He wants us to have new attitude; the kind of attitude that allows us to accept the cross and his death on it, as part of our salvation.  This is what Jesus does; he challenges us to transform our minds and see the good in what may not seem logical or may not meet our own or even society’s expectations.

 

My son showed me today, as we strolled along the hot asphalt that to listen to God’s word means to put it into action. If I am to be a disciple, I shouldn’t criticize so quickly, I should look beyond the obvious, that  family I observed was not just any family they are a very special family. My son saw Jesus and his parents walking to the temple. I need to learn to see with my heart first, like Zac does.